My Normal Life

My Worst Fear…

…dying alone? Not being employed? No relationship? I don’t know why I hear people complain about them. Then, they tell me how lucky I am to be single. How great my single life is, going home with any man that I want. Then they turn around, wrap their arms around their man, and their hearts are taken home, while I still remain sitting alone with my nose to the ground as I hunt around for my happiness.

My brain hurts now. Not in the “headache” way, but in an “I’m so tired of having this tiny little clog inside me! Call a plumber!” sort of way. Well I’m sorry Mr. Brain, I don’t think things work like that. It’s just something you have to put up with, work around for the rest of my life. Besides, my heads been cut open before and you have been looked at. Remember? You were there!

I was told nothing could be done with what I feel is holding me back. Nothing can be done because my clot is in too “sensitive” and area. The whole brain is sensitive! It is not a basketball that can be bounced around in a cornfield. What I always find funny is that I don’t remember that any of this happened. I thought it was something that had only been discussed, but not decided. Well, now I can see what a job well done they certainly did! Thank you Dr. Brain-Surgeon.

I live with this though. I have grown into it. I feel like I’m learning new things every day. For instance; I’m learning today what was in style when Saved by the Bell was popular and my favorite show. Just by looking at some of their clothes makes me thankful that I was too young to wear them. Then I think of what high school girls on television shows in these times wear and I sometimes think about what I have also seen walking on 8 Mile. Thank you mother for teaching me how to be proper, but also for letting me be my own person.

I’m amazed at how much I can remember when I’m watching my Zack Morris and Kelly Kapowski. I can forget to do one thing eight times a day, yet I remember to sing along when Jessy Spano is having her over dose.

So my worst fear these days? Not being able to remember the words to my favorite song.



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