My Normal Life

My New Worst Enemy

Oh what a great party! From what I can remember. Whenever I can never remember a party, I know I must have had one awesome time. And I did. For the most part.

I like when the people invited always bring a dish or drink to share. I try to find something new that I’ve never made, just to test my still new cooking skills. I also try to fill my head with how everyone will see my delicious, intriguing dish and just dive right in. They will love it. Sadly, this never happens. Mine tends to be the most non-eaten plate at the party. I always walk by the table and see the other plates looking emptier, yet I can still count each piece that I had made. I had tried to spread a good word about this mystery grub. I had tried to do my own form of advertisement at a simple small gathering. This seems to not be my area of work to apply for, as my food remains untouched.

I should have just brought beer.

I try to remember who everyone is that I am seeing, as I continue to make my way around the house. I know you, but I don’t know you. Consider yourself a very lucky person if I questionable ask you your name and I’m correct. That must mean that I really like you.

These types of Christmas Parties, that seem to be becoming the new trend, are ones that I am now hoping someone will have just so I can go out and find myself an ugly sweater. I was also seeing that so many of the sweaters I saw that evening were so ugly that they were cute! I wanted them all!

Wandering around a house party help me to see who all was there. I know it was going to be a good time the way I saw what Keith was wearing. He looked like a very relaxed Santa. I also loved the way Ashley and Danny had the same exact red sweaters with green trees on. I noticed this as I passed them with a “hello” as they sat together on the couch. I didn’t ignore Jen and Chris, who were in the same room. I was just in a hurry to the bathroom. Something I should have used before I left my house. I was in a hurry for fun!

I needed to refill my bladder with my drink once I was finished. The kitchen was going to be the most crowded location for the night, as most always seem to be. I was just in the middle of telling Heather how I had constructed my sweater myself when Sam and Rachel walked through the front door. As I watched Heather go overboard seeing them, I glanced around the room to see who else was making their drinks. I think I remember Amy and her boyfriend Tom, I wasn’t sure though.

The basement did have more people in it, I hadn’t been sure if it would. Jason and his new wife Andrea were on the couch along with Becky and Ken. Suddenly, I was noticing something. I continued to look around the room, my face first stuck on Steve’s overly cute fox sweater that I remembered all night I tried to convince him to give to me. What I was noticing, that was just seeming to come to me, was that this was not just an Ugly Sweater Party. This was a Couples Party.

Couples. My one enemy. You are everywhere these days. You seem to want to throw your success on your dating path in my face. You bastards. I love you all, but sometimes, I would just like to attend a singles only gathering. At one of these, I would not feel so guilty having the inappropriate pictures of myself and whoever I’m speaking with in my mind. Yet I don’t see us having very many in this time of life. I still have my happiness somewhere inside for you all, do not be too worried. Somewhere, deep inside this black hole that I am, there is a big smile I have when I see how happy you are. I will never wish that away from you.

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